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Oct
17

TWO YEARS AGO TODAY WE UP AND GOT MARRIED… …and this was our “Save The Date” card. Question: What were your vows? Answer: My vows were as follows… Hey Vicki,My suit is probably very itchy and my collar’s probably way too tight, but right now I don’t notice because you are so beautiful in your dress that is white.Hey Vicki,I promise to start taking you on dates to places besides movies and food courts,and as a bonus I’ll wear shirts with collars and actual pants, not soccer shorts.Hey Vicki,If you ever get sick and can’t get out of bed to make us lunch,don’t worry, I’ll make you soup with advil and hug you a whole bunch.Hey Vicki,Remember that bottle rocket mishap where I ran away because I was so scared…that was a terrible thing to do, I’m so sorry.Hey Vicki,Starting today I promise to protect you from bottle rockets gone awry,And all other scary things like bad dreams, sharks, and pink eye.Hey Vicki,When you turn 80 and look in the mirror and get sad because you have some wrinkles,don’t worry, bald overweight Tanner will cheer you up with a cupcake full of sprinkles.Hey Vicki,I promise to be loyal to you like Patches was to Pam,If you are the green eggs please consider me your ham. Question: Did you keep your vows? Answer: Not so much. I mean, Vicki hasn’t really been attacked by any sharks, so I’ve got that going for me, but other than that… ummmm. I mean, I really wanted my vows to rhyme, so I think that kind of forced me to make some stuff up, just to, you know, get the words to rhyme. Also, I do plan on giving Vicki a cupcake when she turns 80.

TWO YEARS AGO TODAY WE UP AND GOT MARRIED…

…and this was our “Save The Date” card.

Question: What were your vows?

Answer: My vows were as follows…

Hey Vicki,
My suit is probably very itchy and my collar’s probably way too tight,
but right now I don’t notice because you are so beautiful in your dress that is white.

Hey Vicki,
I promise to start taking you on dates to places besides movies and food courts,
and as a bonus I’ll wear shirts with collars and actual pants, not soccer shorts.

Hey Vicki,
If you ever get sick and can’t get out of bed to make us lunch,
don’t worry, I’ll make you soup with advil and hug you a whole bunch.

Hey Vicki,
Remember that bottle rocket mishap where I ran away because I was so scared…
that was a terrible thing to do, I’m so sorry.

Hey Vicki,
Starting today I promise to protect you from bottle rockets gone awry,
And all other scary things like bad dreams, sharks, and pink eye.

Hey Vicki,
When you turn 80 and look in the mirror and get sad because you have some wrinkles,
don’t worry, bald overweight Tanner will cheer you up with a cupcake full of sprinkles.

Hey Vicki,
I promise to be loyal to you like Patches was to Pam,
If you are the green eggs please consider me your ham.

Question: Did you keep your vows?

Answer: Not so much. I mean, Vicki hasn’t really been attacked by any sharks, so I’ve got that going for me, but other than that… ummmm. I mean, I really wanted my vows to rhyme, so I think that kind of forced me to make some stuff up, just to, you know, get the words to rhyme. Also, I do plan on giving Vicki a cupcake when she turns 80.

Dec
21

Contemporary Christmas Classics: 2010 CHRISTMAS CARD (front) “SANTA SHAKEDOWN PART 2” So the Santas decided to make a sequel to Santa Shakedown although they never cleared the rights to the script with with our lawyer. That’s okay though, how can you stay mad at a group of drunk Santas trying to make a film with absolutely no formal training whatsoever. I might be wrong but I don’t think that VHS tape is going to fit into that Super 8 camera. Also, I’m pretty sure that those lights are supposed to be plugged in. Oh Santas, even if you are able to get that camera to work your film is going to be underexposed!

Contemporary Christmas Classics: 2010 CHRISTMAS CARD (front)

“SANTA SHAKEDOWN PART 2”

So the Santas decided to make a sequel to Santa Shakedown although they never cleared the rights to the script with with our lawyer. That’s okay though, how can you stay mad at a group of drunk Santas trying to make a film with absolutely no formal training whatsoever. I might be wrong but I don’t think that VHS tape is going to fit into that Super 8 camera.

Also, I’m pretty sure that those lights are supposed to be plugged in. Oh Santas, even if you are able to get that camera to work your film is going to be underexposed!

Dec
18

Past Christmas Classics: 2007 CHRISTMAS CARD “WINNER” “PEACE AND RESPECT” So we ended up going with this one. It is composed of several of the polaroids that originally had only been part of our “set design”. Still not sure if we made the right decision or not. Polaroids are cool but I think the original design was probably funnier. We actually had quite a few of these printed so I ended up sending them to several work “acquaintances” who probably would have preferred that I had not.

Past Christmas Classics: 2007 CHRISTMAS CARD “WINNER”

“PEACE AND RESPECT”

So we ended up going with this one. It is composed of several of the polaroids that originally had only been part of our “set design”. Still not sure if we made the right decision or not. Polaroids are cool but I think the original design was probably funnier.

We actually had quite a few of these printed so I ended up sending them to several work “acquaintances” who probably would have preferred that I had not.

Dec
09