OH BUNKO WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Seriously, this place does NOT look safe. You already lost one eye in that encounter with the Abominable Snowman’s wife, why risk loosing another? I’m serious, with no eyes you’ll never be able to watch Cucpcake Wars on The Food Network.

PEOPLE OF JAPAN 26 - “THE HUMAN HIGHLIGHTER”

Without the bright blue earmuffs he’d be just another regular guy who happens to wear bright clothes. But with the bright blue earmuffs he ups his game and transforms into “The Human Highlighter”. Watch out because if he thinks you’re important he might brighten your day!!! What an awesome super hero.

Note to self: Make “Human Highlighter” comic book, make lots of money, buy big screen tv, order some pizza, watch Cupcake Wars with Vicki, eat pizza, watch Animal Hoarders with Vicki, order more pizza.

PEOPLE OF JAPAN 21 - “THERE’S A TURTLE ON THE TABLE”

Literally every single person at the Kochi fish market looked like a character from the most incredible film ever. Part of me thinks it wasn’t a market at all but rather some sort of movie set and I just never picked up on it.

If I hired a “science guy” to create a device called an “interesting meter” I’m pretty sure the good folks of Kochi would blow up the machine. Comparatively, most folks near where I live in Brooklyn (such as myself) wouldn’t even make the needle move (assuming the “interesting meter” operates via an analog needle as opposed to a more modern digital readout).

Finally, what the hell am I talking about and what is wrong with me? I have a hot wife somewhere in this apartment and I’m sitting at a computer writing about “interesting meters” that probably would never really work seeing as “interestingness” is a rather objective quality. I just can’t see a robot quantifying something like that.

So now I’m stuck with two options…

1. I can go watch Cupcake Wars with my hot wife (speaking of interesting, check out Cupcake Wars on the Food Network, it’s surprisingly awesome)

or

2. Look for a “Science Guy” on Craigslist

Hmmm….