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INSTANNERGRAM

Inflatable trees and plastic knees,

stolen socks and broken clocks,

missing faces and closed up places,

do not fight crime but surely rhyme!

All of these photos were taken on my portable telephone with an application called Instagram. At first I thought it would somehow create instant graham crackers, boy was I wrong.

Anyway, in an effort to stop neglecting this pathetic excuse of a blog, I might start posting a bunch of instagram photos with stupid captions. Shape up or ship out, at least that’s what my grandpa used to say as he polished his shoes dreaming of instant graham crackers.

Pencil Sharpener: “Knock Knock.”
Me: “Who’s there?”
Pencil Sharpener: “I’m broken.”
Me: “I’m broken who?”
Pencil Sharpener: “I’m broken you idiot! Stop using me if you wanna have any g-damn blue left!!!”
Me: “Knock Knock.”
Pencil Sharpener: “Who’s there?”
Me: “I thought it was the g-damn pencil.”
Pencil Sharpener: “I thought it was the g-damn pencil who?”
Me: “I thought it was the g-damn pencil that was broken, not you. My bad.”

Pencil Sharpener: “Knock Knock.”

Me: “Who’s there?”

Pencil Sharpener: “I’m broken.”

Me: “I’m broken who?”

Pencil Sharpener: “I’m broken you idiot! Stop using me if you wanna have any g-damn blue left!!!”

Me: “Knock Knock.”

Pencil Sharpener: “Who’s there?”

Me: “I thought it was the g-damn pencil.”

Pencil Sharpener: “I thought it was the g-damn pencil who?”

Me: “I thought it was the g-damn pencil that was broken, not you. My bad.”