BABY CANNONBALL BEYOND THUNDER DOME
When Mad Max was arrested for rollerblading naked in the Tina Turner’s Thunder Dome, a pissed off Baby Cannonball swung into action (literally). First, she squeezed her cannonball shaped body into her hyperbolic neoprene jump suit. Next, she shoved her cannonball shaped head into her hermetically sealed bunny helmet. After this, she took a nap.
When she woke up she downed a cup of black coffee and headed out to her green space pod to travel back in time to punch Mad Max in the face for wearing rollerblades.
Inflatable trees and plastic knees,
stolen socks and broken clocks,
missing faces and closed up places,
do not fight crime but surely rhyme!
All of these photos were taken on my portable telephone with an application called Instagram. At first I thought it would somehow create instant graham crackers, boy was I wrong.
Anyway, in an effort to stop neglecting this pathetic excuse of a blog, I might start posting a bunch of instagram photos with stupid captions. Shape up or ship out, at least that’s what my grandpa used to say as he polished his shoes dreaming of instant graham crackers.
MY IPHONE SHOT OF THE WEEK - “EXCITEBIKE”
I liked this one best because of the awesome dilapidated seat and the fact that it made me think of EXCITEBIKE, one of the best 80’s Nintendo games ever! Also, I like orange.
For those of you unfamiliar with EXCITEBIKE, here’s a picture of the original box!!! I found it using a website called Google.
I wish I could still pop a wheelie like cute little EXCITEBIKE MAN, but these days I can’t even do a sit-up without crying, so that’s probably not gonna happen.
Anyway, feel free to check out more of my daily iphone photos here.
MY IPHONE SHOT OF THE WEEK - “THE ROCK SLUG”
For some reason I rather liked this shot of a pile of random rocks just sort of hanging out in a suburban cul-de-sac. Here’s why…
1. With their powers combined all of the stones have conspired together to form “The Rock Slug”, and as such, they are slowly on their way to absorb and destroy all mini-vans and the soccer moms who drive them.
2. I think maybe there’s a big dead body (or two small bodies) buried under those rocks.
3. It reminds me of the suburbs where I grew up. My sister buried many a dead gerbil in our back yard, and atop each gerbil grave a big ol’ rock would serve as the tomb stone. Off the top of my head I remember burying Cookie, Cherry, Cupcake, Candy, and Cinnamon (Perhaps my sister’s naming scheme was bad luck?).
Anyway, if you’d like to see more boring photos like the one above, feel free to check out my iPhone blog, it’s called iPhoneosaurus Rex and it goes ROOOARRRR!!!!
Note to self: Ask my parents why they kept buying my sister gerbils when they knew that they would surely die at her hand.
This manatee is..
a. stealing the mailbox so that he can pawn it for some kelp.
b. trying to eat the mailbox because he ate all his kelp and is still hungry.
c. praying that the mailman delivers some envelopes filled with kelp.
d. thinking to himself “Dude, how much kelp did I smoke? Is this a mailbox? Should I eat it? I think I’ll eat it.”
I’m gonna go with “D”. Just look at his eyes, my man(atee) is baked like a cupcake.
MY IPHONE SHOT OF THE WEEK - “AIN’T NOTHIN’ BUT A THING”
From a technical standpoint this probably wasn’t my best shot, but it’s nonetheless my favorite, here’s why…
1. I like the “can do” attitude of whoever owns this car. I like to think that this person walked out to his car one morning, saw someone had crashed into it, and instead of throwing a fit, he simply said to himself “ain’t nothin’ but a thing baby, ain’t nothin’ but a thing”. He walked back in his house, grabbed some duct tape, patched up the damage, and continued on his merry way to buy some fish food.
2. I like how the license plate says “ERB”. My grandpa’s name was Herb and it made me think of him for the first time in a while. Grandpa Herb was a rather fantastic fellow.
Finally, here’s a photo from back in the day of my Mom and Grandpa Herb relaxin’ in our back yard (I’m particular fond of my mom’s wardrobe selection)…
Anyway, if you’d like to see more of my daily iPhone photos click here.
MY IPHONE SHOT OF THE WEEK - “BLOODY BED BUG INFESTED TELEVISION SET ON BLUE CONCRETE”
In an effort to keep this blog a bit more active I’ve decided to start reblogging one of my iPhone pictures every week. I think every Sunday or Monday I’ll pick my favorite shot from the previous seven days and give you folks the exclusive scoop into the totally true story behind the picture. Let’s get started…
So Vicki and I were limping to the store to get band aids for our bloody feet when we stumbled upon this vintage television set on Dobbin Street in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. I immediately picked it up to carry home when Vicki (a.k.a. Bunko the Buzzkill) reminded me that anything found on the street in Brooklyn definitely probably has Bed Bugs. So I spent the next ten minutes, bleeding mind you, weighing the pros and cons of Bed Bugs versus the Awesome Television Set and wondering what Vicki meant when she said “definitely probably”. Ultimately those Bed Bug Bastards won and I’m still bitter about it.
If you’re curious as to why our feet were bleeding, here’s the deal…
We were playing a fun little game Vicki made up called Die Hard. The rules are simple… we put on wife beaters and run around our apartment on broken glass yelling “Yippie Kay Yay Mother F-er!!!”. The first person to quit looses. Aside from the broken glass part it’s a pretty cool game.
RIGBY THINKS HE’S A BOOK : VOLUME 01
VICKI HAS A VOICE!!!
So today Vicki joined Twitter. It’s not quite Tumblr, but it’s a start. Her username is Bunko the Brave.
To see her as Bunko the Brave hiding out in her Bunk Cave click here.