When I’m not…
a. trying to figure how the hell we’re gonna fit a baby in our apartment
b. planning my trip to Guatemala to punch Captain Worthless in the face for stealing my brand new portable telephone and taking it all the way to freakin’ Guatemala!!!
c. gaining weight
d. buying Vicki flowers…
this is what I’m working on. Actually, I think I can scratch “c” of the list, seeing as I can probably gain weight and use Lightroom simultaneously.
Check me out double taskin’ like a clock radio, sweet!
In August of 1992 Bunko the Brave travelled to the Salton Sea to destroy the man who had stolen not only her Fruit Roll-Up, but also her heart (not to mention her left eye). His name was Ramos, and in middle school he was the lead singer in a glam rock band called “The Glitter Pancake Rebellion”. At the sixth grade talent show he unveiled Clean Sheets are the Best, an epic power ballad about the awesome power of clean sheets. Bunko loved nothing more than sleeping on clean cozy sheets, and as such, her heart swooned for the young Ramos.
The next day at recess Bunko demanded that Ramos be her boyfriend. Ramos told Bunko that he was pretty sure that he was gay, but Bunko wasn’t having it. She immediately declared that they were going steady and that she was ready to have a bunch of babies.
Anyway, after a week of being bossed around by young Bunko, Ramos decided that enough was enough. When Bunko was once again sent to the Principal’s Office for giving Gus, the class Gerbil, a mohawk, Ramos made his move. He broke into Bunko’s “Knight Rider” lunch box and stole her grape Fruit Roll-Up and gave it to Kenny (Bunko’s nemesis and his secret crush).
Long story short, lunch rolled around and Bunko went ballistic when she found out that her one true love had stolen her grape Fruit Roll-Up. She threw her thermos at Kenny’s head and attempted to give Ramos an Indian Rug Burn. Unfortunately she did not take into account the the glue stick in Ramos’ left hand, which he reluctantly shoved deep into her left eye socket.
She was sent to detention for the next fifteen years and upon release she set out to the Salton Sea to destroy Ramos (apparently that’s where he lived). Unfortunately Ramos, as well as most of the town, was long gone. All she found was an empty bottle of beer, an umbrella, and some dead fish.
Apocalyptic Bombay Beach at the Salton Sea, CA
Camera: Nikon FM10
Film Stock: Fuji Velvia 1011
Processing: Cross Processed
Ramos and Kenny fell in love and ran away together to Sweeden. Together with their seven Newfoundland puppies they run a cozy bed and breakfast where the sheets are always clean and the pancakes sparkle with glitter.
See the whole show here. Hopefully if I get my act together I’ll write some poems about some of these.
PEOPLE OF JAPAN 22 - “GOD I LOVE THE LITTLE ONES”
My title needs a bit of explanation…
I’m not sure how this started, but every time Vicki and I are out and about doing whatever it is that we do and we see a cute little kid I suddenly sing the following phrase to Vicki…
“God I LOVE the little ones”
What’s even stranger is that I’m clearly trying to imitate the lead singer of Modest Mouse every time I sing it, although I can’t tell if it’s supposed to be set to one of his tunes or not. Neither of us can remember how or why this started, it’s quite strange. I literally sing it with the exact same inflection every single time, and somehow it’s heavily influenced by Modest Mouse.
Anyway, if you look closely at this photo you will see the head of a cute little kid popping up from behind a bowl, thus the title.